Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Honesty

Let me tell you a boring story,


.


.


I had a really big insecurity. As probably those of you have passed this stage, I was afraid to shout out my opinion


My mom always told me, "do this, and you'll be loved", "don't do this, or they will hate you". And stuffs that create my young self as a good child.


But life doesn't work always that way. I held back a lot


.


.


When I had a fight, not only with my family, but also my friends, I couldn't say the reasons why I was mad, or upset.


I only said, "no it's fine, everything's alright"


 I never talked bad, or said something that makes people feel bad. Because I was afraid people would hate me for the way I was. I wanted to be loved, and had everyone as my friends


It's like when your girlfriend wore something that doesn't suit her body type, but you can't say anything instead of "oh wow you're pretty!"


which is totally a lie. . .


.


.


.


.


But then,


is it good if it happens continuously ?


.


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Is this the purpose of life?


Telling people all the good things that they want to hear


.


.


Back again,


what's the meaning of being loved by everyone?


.


.


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Is it even, necessary?


.


.


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We're, humans..


We don't always have good side, but also bad side as well


Although we try our best to conceal it, we will still have it no matter what. Because we are not angels


Sure we try to do our best to become better person,


but it doesn't mean we're free of guilt or sin


.


.


No matter what happens, or what we do,


there will always people hate or dislike us


But,


there will always also some people who love us for the way we are


7 billions people in this world are living right now, and it doesn't mean that everyone's gonna hate you, nor love you


.


That's a life


.


And people grow stronger and enrich their experience through those things


I had stopped caring about people's thoughts afterwards


Sure it's not easy to suddenly change my point of view


But instead of being loved for who I am not, I would rather be hated for what I really am


.


Think again, if you lie to yourself and to your friends about what you really think,


do they really love you?


Are you okay living your life like that?


.

.


.


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I then began to think,


if I am hated, then what?


It's not like my life is going to be turned upside down just because of someone hates me


If you're afraid of that thought, always think,


that this small matter will be laughed at by yourself 5 years later


If you still think it's going to be a problem even after 5-10 years, then you may re-think what you act


Losing someone just because you shout out your opinion doesn't even worth your time to be in agony


It just means that they aren't good enough to be your close one


.


 

Accept your own flaw, admit it, then you can become stronger!


If your close friends acknowledge your bad side and accept you the way you are, and so do you, cherish it


Becoming close doesn't mean you only know their good side only, but also bad side! And when you can accept it, that is what is called a good relationship. Whether it's family, friends, or even lover?


If you hold back, other parties will never know what you think of


And it's just the matter of time before the explosion


.


That's why when people say about how I deal with haters and I say that I don't care, it's a truth, yet a lie


I do think about it, sometimes I feel sad. But then again, why should I care?


There will always someone that know the real you, or if you dont have, go find one!


It's a life, and that's the real world


.


You can't expect everyone, and impress the whole world


Even, the Perfect God has haters,


why should you complain about some groups that dislike you?


.


.


.


Now I am not afraid to shout out most of my opinions


I get talked, and disliked yes


But then, so what? I still have my life, and I still have friends that love me and accept me the way I am


They tell me things that they don't like about myself


I was afraid before this but in fact it's useless because I was afraid of nothing!


Life will be easier if people speak honestly


.u




Photo on 2012-03-20 at 10.33

Don't lose to yourself, Don't lose your own personality


Speak up your opinion and be honest


.


 

12 comments:

Naomi said...

This is true, you should always love yourself first even though it's hard. Who cares what anyone else thinks? Honesty is a beautiful thing :-)
Btw you're my fav Indonesia blogger! It's been a while since I've been back home.

Fenn said...

well said. it also took me quite sometime to just accept reality and the fact we can't make everyone happy. and I've never been happier, nowadays I don't care much about what the others think of me. they all can hate me to hell and back and still i don't give a single fuck.

justinaalissaw said...

IMO, sometimes we should hold in what we really are because society sucks.

I kinda feel the same way, you know, sometimes I can't yell at my friend who obviously make a mistake because I'm afraid it will hurt her feeling then, I always ended up saying 'fine, it's okay no big deal' or something like that.

Sometimes I think it's kinda wrong, because it's not just being not honest to my friends, but most important, i'm being not honest to myself. But recently, don't know why I'm just being more ignorance, and just let everything flow, and of course it made my day feel lighter. hehehe.

sorry for the long post, just sharing^^

Stella Lee said...

you go Fenn! Haha..
Yea without worrying about everyone, I feel much better ;D

Stella Lee said...

thank you! I'm honored if you think so (/__; )/
welcome back to home!

Stella Lee said...

yeap I agree too..
Sometimes I hold back to on some occasions.. But not as many as I used to
Esp when I have formal meeting, I can't act according to my usual behavior. Though I still say about my opinion, but in a better way?
Everyone has their own way to express themselves ^^

ella said...

setuju dech sama kmu
cuz aq pernah n bahkan sering ngalamin hal kayak gtiu.
bahkan buat pertahanin argumen yg menurut aq benar, pernah aq debat ma hampir semua temen sekelas aq (dgn cara yg baik2 alias debat terbuka). dan yg pling aq benci hampir semua temen yg tdnya sepemikiran ma aq berubah hanya untuk menyelamatkan dirinya dari image buruk. thumbs up buat postingan kamu

Stella Lee said...

wtf apa bagusnya image yang baik kalau harus membohongi diri sendiri dan orang lain :x
well i wont say that kita gak butuh image baik, butuh, hanya gak harus selalu selalu mengikuti arus kan :x i wish everyone would speak up about their opinions more freely.. asian people tend to not speak honestly di depan orangnya, makanya sering banyak salah paham :| well.. buatku sii haha

Anonymous said...

hahaha iya stell cuz image itu bakalan dtg sndr sesuai dgn niat kita,,mau org itu brusaha keliatan baek tp klo pd dsrnya itu cuma buat image ntr juga keliatan belangnya. n sebaliknya klo udh niatnya baik mau d sampein dg cr yg pedes pun ntr pd akhirnya org bkln tw mksd di balik itu apa.

Stella Lee said...

TRUE <3
But aku tau kita gak bisa menyenangkan hati semua orang jadi apa daya, mari hidup sesuai dengan prinsip masing-masing hahaha.. yg penting gak gangguin orang lain :>

jessicab said...

because time will tell who deserved to stay by our side,
and who will get washed away.
life is too short to think about what people would say!
*HUG*

Stella Lee said...

haha.. how long we've been together ya, 8 years? crazy
and why you appear suddenly on this post, go awayyyyyy lol

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